TheGAMEofLIFE

Although people will never admit it, life is a game. When confronted with the reality of that fact, people will deny till their mouths froth.

There is next to nothing I will not say, do, or try. That is one of the main reasons why I choose to belong to God. After the fact that it was He who stepped into an imminent situation and allowed the driver(me) to survive a vicious accident with next to no injuries. The only marks I have to remember my “incident” area tracheotomy hole in my neck and a cut on my right wrist, I assume is where I “successfully” dampened the impact between my head and the cedar tree. If I didn’t raise my right arm up to soften the impact of the cedar tree and my head, God only knows. There is also a mark, my second belly button, where my feeding tube was placed. God did me another 1 up by not letting me remember my life before the accident, not feeling the sorrow and the self-hatred that comes with.

 The adrenaline rush has led me to do somewhere between eighteen and eighty-seven percent of all the bad things I’ve done. I believe I was once humorous, but then this “incident” happened, opening my eyes to the truth. Funniness and popularity go hand in hand, or so the world says. If a person is laughing with you at something you have said, it is up to you to dissect the situation, finding out if what you have said is truly funny or if the person has ulterior motives. Before the accident, people laughed at nearly everything I said.

My first stage of recovery was slow but continuous. All of the following stages, from then till now, have blended together. I lost the ability to tell one change from another, whether good or bad. So when asked if the doctors have any particular hopes, I shrug my shoulders while saying to myself, “They don’t really know, all they can do is make educated guesses.” It is a maddening thing to realize that as far as they’re concerned there is no difference between you and a test monkey. This is yet another reason I have chosen to follow God.

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Memories

What I can remember of my past is a lot less than what most people would like but far more than what they realize. Conclusions and facts are all I have for me to go by, which is hard to do considering facts are laid out for people to draw their conclusions from. I have come to the conclusion that facts have been subtly changing over the years; the facts that people once deemed right, are now considered wrong . What was considered bad is now ok and what was good has been changed to bad. The name of Christ has been trampled, then run through a blender. The look you’re liable to receive at the mere mention of Christ or of you being a Christian, one would think you’re discussing the proper ways to dismantle puppies.

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Poppycock, pussy-footers, and other riffraff

What people think about me, my injury, and the outcome of my accident differs from the person and the relationships I had with. Some hoped I would make it back to where I stand today while others mentally said the opposite. I still can not believe nor do I think that I deserve what I have received. All I have to say on the subject is that God is good all the time, and all the time God is good. I am saying that God uses common people to do great things for Him.

TMI has been a problem I have slowly become ever so aware of. By “TMI” I mean upon being asked a little question, randomly I will answer and will “share” Too Much Information. Being a problem, I can only attribute to my injury, I feel as if I had better find a mental adaptation to address this for another drug does not “dandy my fancy”.

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I was posted up at the door of UVA Hospital doing what brings me joy, that is playing a game I like to call “doorman”. The game is not really a game at all, it negates the boredom that waiting rooms bring, it gives me time to exercise, and it more than takes care of the recommended hour and a half a person is to be in a standing position. While holding the door for people personally  I like to ask them how their morning, day, or evening is going and finish with a “You, have a better than bad day”, or something of that nature.  From my point of view, there was no reason to speed up, to run around at the world’s speed, and boost the chances of dying from stress-related illnesses. It is what it is.

Realities, the owning of

Adverse to what you hear your reality is not your own. It is not something that you can tailor to your beliefs, likes, and/or dislikes. Although this is what’s being “preached” by some media worldwide, it simply does not fit with reality. The erasing of history, the occurrences whether good or bad, is ridding ourselves of reality. And you know what happens next don’t you? The reality is replaced with some feel-good nonsense of “their” choosing. If we do not protect our reality or history, then we have no right to voice a complaint if and/or when it gets repeated.

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Why cover up the truth? You know the feeling when you have been caught in a lie, more horrible than nice isn’t it. I think they would rather sink with the ship, then swim for safety. For fear of the mass ridicule, they would face. Think about how devastating it would be to their system, the billions of dollars spent to hold up the lies that make up evolution.

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Realities, the owning of

Adverse to what you hear, the reality is not your own. It is something that has been granted to you, but always remember and never forget that the with reality comes the choice of doing right or wrong. It is not something that you can tailor to your beliefs, likes, and/or dislikes. Although this is what’s being “preached” by some media worldwide, it simply does not fit with reality. The erasing of history, the occurrences whether good or bad, is ridding ourselves of reality. And you know what happens next don’t you? The reality is replaced with some feel-good nonsense of “their” choosing. If we do not protect our reality or history, then we have no right to voice a complaint if and/or when.

 

 

Everyone looks, not knowing what to say but look on they do.

Windows to their souls, darting quick to safety at the mere mention of what is.

Not even considering whether or not what’s said is true,

But pouncing on the first chance to close their ears.

And talking bout you like you are not where you are, have not been through what they…

What can be done, what can I do.

I open my ears and get bombarded.

By flailing feelings getting thrown from by people, place to place.

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